To Tell You The Truth

Does anyone know where I can get a linguistic surgery, to excise a phrase from my elocutionary habits? The other day I was writing an email to Lina while she was at work and I typed 'To tell you the truth" as a way to emphasize the veracity of a statement I had composed.

Then, I thought about it and added, "it is not like I don't tell you the truth anyway." So, I asked Lina to help me flag when I used this "To tell you the truth" stuff when speaking or writing because it is just stupid and redundant and sends the message that I might not be honest unless I utter these words.

To tell you the truth, (there I go again) I employ this phrase more than a chain cigarette smoker goes outside to smoke at a workplace that has a no-smoking indoors policy. I almost regret telling Lina that I needed to have her help me; it is like I can't help myself and now she is flagging me every several minutes.

I suggested she obtain one of those barking collars for dogs that shocks them if they keep barking so that she can send me a shock if I don't stop. It has come to that. Our pastor and wife has one of these collars for their baying beagle when she is barking too much or engaging in some other unwanted to behavior (like snatching others' cookies off of trays which I am prone to do also).

Jesus said, "Verily, verily" (Truly, truly) on occasion, to emphasize the importance of what He was about to say. I retreated to this as my defense when I started to consider having Lina as my linguistic cop as stressing me out (she seems amused by it all) . Her reply was, "Yeah, but He did not say it all of the time."

She is right....to tell you the truth.

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