O Great Whopper In the Sky


I have consumed my yearly Burger King Whopper, chocolate shake, and french fries. I do this annually after fulfilling my responsibilities as the Test Supervisor for the SATs. As non-fun as the SATs are for students, I assure you that they are exponentially much less fun for me. I get stressed because this one test does much to determine the path that students take after high school and I want to make sure that the administration goes well. So much is riding on it. 

But, I do get paid and that helps ease the pain. Why I punish myself more to eat fast food is hard to fathom. I must hate myself...

I am not sure how I got into the ritual of doing the BK run after the SATs. I think it may derive from when I was a kid and my dad would take us once a year to Burger King and then we would head to a Phillies game. The Whopper developed almost mythic proportions in my child's brain. Like Rosebud in Citizen Kane. The Burger Grail. I no longer deify Whoppers, yet it does seem appropriate to gorge myself once a year. Last year I had a Double Whopper with Bacon, supersized my fries, and had a large chocolate shake. I calculated the calories like an SAT math problem and it was over 2,000. Hence, why it is once a year. I think I turned the corner a couple of weeks ago on last year's Post-SAT meal. Probably why my appendix burst.

Favoring BK as a kid (and now, I am at least happy they got rid of the weird commercials with the Burger King character who acted like a lecher, psychopath, and just plain creepy, creepier than Mitt Romney), made me contemplate brand loyalty. Here are a few. Burger King over McDonald's, Keds over Converse, Skippy over Jif, Coke over Pepsi,  Chevy over Ford, Crest over Colgate. I even preferred Catholic over Protestant. My best friend took me to his mainline Protestant Church for Sunday School once and it was like play-time. I think in my Catholic Sunday School were were reading through Exodus (no joke).  I remember thinking, "Where is the guilt?" Catholics are great at guilt.

To this day I would rather be an Orthodox Catholic versus a wishy-washy middle of the road mainstream Protestant. Fast food faith. Here is hoping that the Catholic Church finally in the 21st century repents and reforms and returns to the Scriptures rather than its Vodoo. The Catholic Church never answered the Reformers instead decided to use the stake. Now, the stake is though its own heart. Mainstream Protestantism no longer stands for anything so it is hard to be against. It is wordlier than the world. May the next Pope heed the death-rattle and move his church back from the edge of destruction.

I had a dude down at Temple one time try to persuade me once that the Protestant Reformation was the worst thing that ever happened to Christendom. I decidedly disagreed. I instead think that the Reformation forced the Roman Catholic Church to curb its most venal and egregious sins and thus helped preserve the Holy See. Now, Catholicism is collapsing from within. It is rotten to the core but as a Reformed Christian I take no joy in seeing it falter. I pray for its health. May God be gracious yet again to all of us in the faith. Amen.



         

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Shake the Dust: Anis Mojgani

Pslam 90:2 "Before the mountains were brought forth, or ever thou hadst formed the earth and the world, even from everlasting to everlasting, thou art God." I am not real certain where Anis Mojgani comes from belief-wise. Cats like him tend to be synchrestic spiritually rather than Christ-centered. Yet, this poem captures the spirit of Jesus. What this poem also needs is grace....we shake off sin and mortality and take on Christ and immortality. This is for the fat girls This is for the little brothers For the former prom queen And for the milk crate ball players This is for the school yard wimps And the childhood bullies that tormented them Shake the dust. This is for the benches and the people sitting upon them. This is for the bus drivers driving a million broken hymns And for the men who have to hold down 3 jobs, Simply to hold up their children. For the nighttime schoolers And for the midnight bike riders trying to fly Shake the dust. For the two year olds who cann
Read more

White Shoes, White Stones

Rev 2:17 He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith to the churches. To him that overcometh, to him will I give of the hidden manna, and I will give him a white stone, and upon the stone a new name written, which no one knoweth but he that receiveth it. (ASV) With the white stone mentioned above in the Scripture verse, "And will give him a white stone" it is "Supposed that by the white stone is meant pardon or acquittance, and the evidence of it; and that there is an allusion here to the custom observed by judges in ancient times, who were accustomed to give their suffrages by white and black pebbles; those who gave the former were for absolving the culprit, those who gave the latter were for his condemnation." (Clarke) What has brought about this essay was my purchasing the other day of some very white and new Nike jogging shoes. My old pair of Nike's have been worn down. I was developing serious pain in my feet which is a solid sign that it is t
Read more

Going Rogue: Dare, Risk, Dream

Image
I picked up a bumper sticker at a Pub recently from the Rogue Brewery . On it there are the words: DARE, RISK, DREAM. Typically, the word Rogue is a negative term. I will let you decide if Sarah Palin and her book has made the word less or more so. Initially, I taped the bumper sticker to my computer lap top with the backing still on it in case I wanted to remove it. Just a second ago, I committed fully, and pulled the backing off and affixed it to my Dell. No turning back. Is that not an illustration of how to accomplish great things? We have to stick and commit. If we go taping ourselves to the backs of things, it leads to easier removal but also to tepid efforts. Now, if I take this bumper sticker off the back of my lap top it is going to be a mess...I am all in. Consequences be damned. My summer vacation officially began today at noon (why else would I be blogging at 3:26 am?) and my creed for the summer is DARE, RISK, DREAM. A Kerouac quote to light the fireworks... "Great th
Read more