To-Do Prayer List

I am an inveterate list maker. Being the forgetful sort with low memory capacity like a 1970's Atari computer, I find lists to be an easy way to both recall what I need to do and also to prioritize tasks. Or to ignore things that I know that I need to do but would rather not. I don't forget such things, I just kick the task can down the calendar road for awhile.

Like calling the landscapers.....

In terms of faith practice, I am fairly decent at reading the Bible and devotional material, being mindful of God, attending church, and tithing. But, I have been traditionally a poor pray-er. Like D minus.

Part of this is fatalism...God does what He wants. Who am I to try and direct the powerfully deep currents of Providence? I have written about this before. God may be pleased by my obedience in praying but that hardly means I am going to sway His omniscient mind. Less theological, another is laziness. Praying seems to be hard work. For just muttering mere words, prayer is weighty and exhausting at times.

So, I have been praying off a list this year which I update every couple of weeks. The structure of the list keeps me from drifting off at 5:40 in the morning. The coffee also helps like Ritalin. Yet, it seems too perfunctory and predictable. I try to pray with some originality on the same topics and routinely ask for updates if I am praying for someone, but often sense that I am just running down the list and crossing stuff off like a grocery list.

Perhaps the best metaphor I can come up with is that my prayer life should be like playing the piano (not that I can do that...but if I could); some structure, some freedom.

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