Red Sports Car and Retribution
If you have been listening to the podcast you know that I have been reflecting on Soren's book Purity of Heart is To Will One Thing. I just finished Chapter 4, The Reward Disease. When we do good to receive primarily an earthly reward (possessions, power, privilege, pleasure, all of those "P" words that boil down to Pride and Presumption). If I do good, I deserve one, some, or all of these P's. Versus, doing the will of God and letting the consequences come, for earthly good or ill. A hard teaching.
As James writes in his Epistle, "Let no many of you become teachers for you shall incur a stricter judgment." A lot of people desire platforms these days as long as praise comes their way. Not many of us want that platform if it makes us a target of abuse. Soren observes that we may be perfectly in God's will and still be abused. Soren knew that reality well. He wrote what he wrote and paid the price in ridicule. He increasingly hiked his criticism of Danish Christendom and the leaders and crowd in Copenhagen cried "Crucify him!" by the nails of jeering and even worse, apathy.
So, knowing that there is no guarantee that our good acts will generate a reward, I should have suspected a lesson was coming down the road and it was. Actually behind me.
I recently bought a new car. My old 2007 Honda Civic gave up the ghost. After three mechanics from three different shops, two of them Honda specialist, were unable to fix the parasitic leak which was draining the battery and make it go dead, I concluded it was throwing good money after bad and I needed to bite the bullet and buy a new car. Truly new. Since I want to make the Honda CRV able to haul both a kayak and my mountain bike/street bike, I needed to buy the roof rack and assorted parts. The dealership up in Lebanon, Pa. had the parts come in but couldn't do the installation until October 4 and it was going to cost about $300 dollars for the labor.
My hometown bike mechanic in Wrightsville, Cycleworks, thought he could do it a lot sooner and for $100. So I drove up yesterday to Lebanon to pick up the parts. It is one of those ironies that the CRV created the need for more room as the roof rack and assorted equipment is built for a CRV and not a Civic. So it hauled all of the boxes with ease, The CRV is more car than I need but the HRV just won't be available until January. And I didn't have that long.
On the way back from Lebanon to Wrightsville, Google Maps was taking me on a new route. Soon after pulling out of the dealership and getting on some road through suburbia on the way to the country, a middle-aged/elderly silver-haired dude pulled right behind me in a red sports car convertible and was clearly getting irritated that I was only exceeding the posted mph of 35 by 5 mph. Thus, after about 5 minutes of him riding my bumper, he passed me. I let him know that I thought he was being an entitled jerk through a hand-gesture.
And hence the crux of the lesson began. In my podcast, I have used the example of attempting to be a courteous and respectful driver by generally abiding within the posted speed limits and being safe. Now, I am not a legalist about it, some give and take and flexibility is fine. For example, going 65 mph on a 55 mph road is generally safe. Going 95 and weaving in and out of traffic is not. I very much see red when a driver is being reckless. So, I have an expectation that other drivers, mostly male, won't be jerks and endanger others. Thus, I have the reward disease which is essentially if I drive responsibly, so should the other drivers. Which is a dumb expectation. There is no ironclad rule that operates like this. I act respectfully when driving because it is the right thing to do, loving my neighbor.
The tension arises when an entitled old man in the proverbial midlife or older crisis thinks that what he wants trumps all other peoples rights. White men, by the way, are the most entitled people on this planet. It is not even close. Second place, the pushy Karen's at Target. And to let them slide, or any other asshole driver or shopper, just encourages the entitlement if unconfronted. So, I threw the holy bird. But, I remembered that in my podcast, I observed such a gesture usually results in an unproductive escalation. The main reason being that rude people typically don't respond well to legit confrontation. And get this, it is because they are rude!
As it was, the elderly dude sped away in his little red ego massage machine. I didn't chase him down and force him to recant as old white men also are statistically more likely to carry handguns. I see carrying a gun for some to be a characteristic of being a dick. Willing to push confrontation because one is packing heat. Not always of course but at least my suspicion is that some gun owners expect to be in life-threatening situations because they tend to escalate conflict. George Zimmerman comes to mind. That weasel would not have tangled with Trayvon Martin had he not been armed.
As my little reminder to practice restraint, I had the opportunity to practice patient reflection for the next 30 minutes on back country windy and hilly roads on the way to Wrightsville as I was stuck behind a truck pulling a trailer who was consistently 5-10 mph under the speed limit. I didn't want to take the risk of passing because it was dangerous to do so. The parade of cars followed until I was just ten minutes away from my destination. I decided to chill out on a beautiful Fall day with the sunroof open and embrace the beauty of the trip. No reason to court danger to save 5 minutes and possibly to risk a life. Soren's Driving School, as it were. The reward was to let God give me peace and joy despite the slow going. Better to take in the loveliness of the country rather than rush by it.
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