Everything AND the Kitchen Sink

Everything but the kitchen sink. 

Etymology: 

Based on the idea that if you brought many things to someone, a kitchen  sink is one of the last things you would bring because it is difficult to move.

Copyright © Cambridge University Press 2003.

Yesterday, I was scrubbing down the shower stall in my house. Through years of neglect and disassociation, over 50 years in the making, I have a high degree of tolerance for grime as compared to most humans. I have gotten better in recognizing that others may not have the same filth fortitude as I, so I have made strides in being sensitive that my ways cause others to want to hurl. With the males of the immediate family coming to my estate in Columbia in early June, where my dad is the only person who has a higher tolerance for dirt than I, I am beginning the reclamation project.     

As I was strategically moving the shower head to spray down the crud off the shower walls after scrubbing, I broke it from the shower piping. Holding a dismembered shower head in my hands, I pondered how the day's schedule had now changed. I had planned to grade my students' essays from school in the early morning (after scrubbing the shower), but the prospect of not being able to shower with a cascading shower head--I suppose I could have taken a shower with the drill of H2O coming out straight from the piping--I decided to pay a visit to my local ACE Hardware.

I am very fortunate to live within walking distance of a great hardware store stocked with every doo-dad and/or materials I might need and the tools to get the job done. The store's staff is also helpful and knowledgeable. I get overwhelmed by Lowe's and Home Depot where everyone seems to know what they want, where to get it, and how to do the job. Unless I am buying an appliance or a lot of wood (like I did for my hops trestle) I stick to ACE.  The store seems to make an effort to buy American also which I tend to favor.

Also within close striking distance of my house is a beer distributorship, an AutoZone, a grocery store, a gas station, a State Store, and several other essential services. There is also a McDonald's but I hardly ever eat fast food. And, a Planet Fitness. But, I bought all of my own fitness equipment and can't stand the preening and machine hogging in fitness clubs. I don't like to lollygag when working out. 25 minutes, done, over and out. People stare at those wall mirrors like Narcissus.  Plus, it is a dating and hook-up culture I am sure for the healthy-minded hedonist. 

After looking a the headless shower, appearing like Ichabod Crane, and seeing that it was officially broken not just detached, I also thought it might be a good idea to fix my leaking toilet and kitchen sink, too. I knew that I was entering a zone of ignorance as I am not the handiest dude around. YouTube does help, though, and I can usually figure things out through trial and error, with the error being the emphasis. I am decent and passable at taking things apart, horrible about putting it back together.  

As I went to take out the kitchen sink so that I could get the nut to take out the old faucet hardware (hard to get to from below), it was a mess of rust in the supporting metal bars anchoring it to the counter. Since my place was build in 1989, I am sure this is the first time anyone has set eyes on the under-girding since then. I decided to get a new sink as well as a new showerhead and toilet fixtures. I have learned that it is often essential to bring the old in order to make sure the new fits. So, I grabbed all of the broken stuff and was soon at ACE looking like Fred Sanford, the junkyard man. 

The repairs, of course, were much harder than I expected. I did have a nagging sense that this would be the case but it was early in the day and I figured in my stupidity and slow uptake in the calculations of the time I had available. Not good to run out of time when  the store has shut its doors for the night. There are often revisits needed when doing a job.    

I learned some really interesting lessons besides the usual "if all else fails, read the directions." For the benefit of my reading audience, here are the pointers:

- Make sure to keep old parts and new parts separate. Sometimes an old piece is needed but that is typically only on a case-by case basis. I had several situations yesterday where I had two parts and had a difficult time figuring out which was new and which was old. The showerhead was obvious but the toilet and kitchen sink were not. 

- Don't try to use an old part with new equipment even though it may save labor. I was trying to fasten the drainage pipe to the sink with the old fastener and I couldn't get the sink from leaking. I thought it was a universal fit. I finally figured out that the large brass circular fitting was designed specifically for the threads of the new sink's drain (actually had to to buy that in addition to the sink). 

- This is a corollary to the above. Don't throw any pieces out. They are there for a reason. I have a sprayer attachment and for the life of me I couldn't figure out where the piece was for the sprayer to sit and where the supporting hardware was. I recalled that I had tossed a fitting out and surmised that is where that went and I found the silver circle that the sprayer sat on. The fitting was in the trash out back and I had to fish it out at 3:00 AM when I woke up perseverating about the leak in the kitchen sink. I had the 3:30 insight that the brass fitting had to replace the old PVC fitting attaching the sink drain to the drainage pipe. I had thought initially that the sprayer stuff was part of the drainage apparatus but then deduced otherwise.

- I was also going to replace my bathroom sink fixtures as the hot water has been leaking for a while so I shut off the valve and just use the cold. When  the plumber had last visited, I had him fix it but it didn't stay fixed. I let plumbing jobs accrue and the last sweep I had most everything fixed. Except of course, the kitchen sink. I knew that I was living on borrowed time with it and eventually it would go from a small leak to perhaps a major catastrophe and I was biding my time. I decided wisely that the bathroom sink would be one job too many. I could have done it but I would probably be doing it now instead of blogging. I try to take a Sabbath when possible and Sunday starts for me at sunrise. 

- After getting all the plumbing issues addressed, I graded my students' essays for class from 4:00 to 5:30 AM. I had tried to do the grading Saturday afternoon but the Schoology website (an online learning platform) was down. I was hoping to be able to get back to sleep for a spell afterwards and I did catch an extra hour or so sleep before getting up for good. I learned from grad school that all-nighters are terrible. Better to sleep a while and then get up. I knew I had a water leaking issue when I went to bed but I was not in a favorable state to address it. I refuse to grade on Sundays during the day. I need to walkaway from my job in order to walk in it. 

- Plumbing is hard work! Since we have shipped whatever labor we can to other places in the globe, Americans are losing touch with know-how and hard work. We used to be able to repair our own things but now outsource almost anything we can. That is fine if you are a Wall Street hedge-funder but for most of us, delegation can add up to major outlays in dollars. There is a point where it makes sense to let a more skilled person do a job but some jobs we need to take back and figure it out. My back and body hurt today and it is a reminder than repairing is taxing. I tell you though, it sure makes the beer and whiskey taste good when the job is done.

Abraham Lincoln correctly observed that slavery was immoral because it stole the labor of another without recompense. The U.S. has used the global marketplace to imprison and enslave people. It is an uncomfortable truth but our leisure and comfort has come at the expense of someone else's unjust pain. There is nothing free market about using China's repressive regime to reduce our costs. Trump is right but for the wrong reason. The loss of American jobs is only a function of our willingness to let others do our work on the cheap. Including Trump doing so every time he has had the opportunity--him selling big chunks of Manhattan to foreign interests, etc. In fact, it is nearly impossible to find anyone who has benefited more from Wall Street malfeasance (through the escalation of real estate prices in New York City via stock market valuations and profits).  Maybe it makes him the one to fix after he and others broke it BUT don't act innocent.   
           

-Here is my major final takeaway. Small leaks are often indicative of a larger issue. We can ignore the slow leak in the tire and keeping putting air back in until the tire has a blow-out on the interstate, the smell of natural gas in the air leading to an explosion, the nagging sickness that is not getting better which is what my perforated appendix was...having a school nurse just a door down from my office probably saved my life a couple of years ago. I thought it was the flu. If I had seen her the day before rather than trying to tough it out, odds are that the surgeon could have scoped the appendix out rather than have to cut my abdomen open, and making recovery take several months than a couple of days. I do have some sweet scars though across my gut.    

We are experts at denial and suppression, ignoring the evidence, and presuming upon a better yet false interpretation. Moral laxness typically does not happen overnight and all at one time. Instead it is the slow and steady accretion of bad habits over good habits. This isn't legalism, this is ethical reality. 

Being less than honest once will typically make it easier to lie again and to a broader audience. Cheating creates the need to cheat more to cover one's tracks. A foray into the forbidden world of porn can become a one way street to deeper and darker avenues of depravity. When we pull out the kitchen sink underpinnings of our souls, we see decay that is hidden but won't be forever.  A collapse is in store, the leak will go from a drip to a river. A piece will no longer be able to function under the pressure and give way. 

Everything. Including the kitchen sink.