Razed Eyebrows
For those in my huge audience that turn to my blog for deep thoughts, you will have to search out Jack Handey for your bowl of meaning this day. Brace yourself....today, I fear, is going to be frivolous. Will you still respect me in the morning? I also will not dishonor the Word by attaching it to this tripe. Maybe I could have a "Fluffy Friday" feature where I write about an inane issue weekly.
I have a way to tell when I need a haircut. You might thing that the trigger is long, wild, and untamed hair. No. Well, that is not quite correct. It is hair...but it is my eyebrow hair. Though I don't quite have a "Unibrow," I think it accurate to say that my eyebrows are like Siamese Twins. When my eyebrows start looking like they need a weed-whacker, and when I can no longer see without the bramble-brow filtering the sun, then I head to my barber.
For quite some time, I went to Holiday Hair in Columbia. But, the last time I was there, I got in the middle of some type of cat fight among the girls as there was only one hairstylist I was sure could give me the cut I like. Buzzed with clippers on the side and back, blended on the top of the head by scissors and close cropping. It should not be a hard cut to manage but I have found some hairstylists can't handle the clippers.
So, I waited for like an hour for the woman that has shown herself to be adept....while the other girl, without anyone in her chair, seethed and mumbled under her breath (I went to K-Mart instead of waiting in the shop and having to be in the line of fire between the personnel) . Sorry, unless I see you in action before-- doing a similar cut as mine--I am not going to let you treat my hair like your clipper internship.
I was in a situation a couple of years ago at Holiday where I had to stop the girl cutting my hair mid-cut and insist that she lay down her weapons and let someone else take over. Geez, if I showed up at the high school where I work with a cut looking like where she was taking it, it would take 4 years to get it out of the system of the kids' mockery. Don't wanna look like Shemp from the Three Stooges.
Another factor is that Holiday Hair for women employees and Jiffy Lube for men employees have about the fastest employee turnover of any businesses I have ever seen. I'm serious, I walk into my Holiday or my Jiffy Lube, and I might recognize two workers. What happened? Did they violate parole? (more for the guys...some of those dudes look like they learned to change oil in the big house). Just when I develop three Holiday girls I can trust (I watch their work), they leave me.
So, I have started to go to a local barber down the road. No cat fights, no wait. He is a one man shop. He used to be a bridge-builder and then he couldn't do it anymore body-wise, so he switched careers and became a barber (a lifelong goal). I appreciate the fact that he knows how to wield the clippers gracefully and that he only charges $ 11. Without the franchise and managment layers taking their cut as it is at Holiday, the cut is cheaper and better. The cut at Holiday, if I remember correctly, is $ 18. Now that my wife runs her hand through my hair for free, the female touch means less to me now than it did when I was single.
The barber does seems to take a special relish in trimming eyebrow hair. He seems to be one of these men who likes to set things straight...be it eyebrow hair, a child, or otherwise. Plus, I think he had some pent-up frustration because he told me of another customer who has these super-brows, and who will not the barber trim them. I think some of this pent-up frustration came out yesterday when I went in for my haircut.
He leaned in hard into my eyebrows and gave me the equivalent of a scalping. When I saw how much of my brows he had in his comb ready to be mowed down, I winced. Now, my eyebrows are only slightly hairier than my Asian-ancestried wife. And that ain't much. She is going to have to add some darkness to mine, as she does to her eyebrows, if we go out in public.
I have a way to tell when I need a haircut. You might thing that the trigger is long, wild, and untamed hair. No. Well, that is not quite correct. It is hair...but it is my eyebrow hair. Though I don't quite have a "Unibrow," I think it accurate to say that my eyebrows are like Siamese Twins. When my eyebrows start looking like they need a weed-whacker, and when I can no longer see without the bramble-brow filtering the sun, then I head to my barber.
For quite some time, I went to Holiday Hair in Columbia. But, the last time I was there, I got in the middle of some type of cat fight among the girls as there was only one hairstylist I was sure could give me the cut I like. Buzzed with clippers on the side and back, blended on the top of the head by scissors and close cropping. It should not be a hard cut to manage but I have found some hairstylists can't handle the clippers.
So, I waited for like an hour for the woman that has shown herself to be adept....while the other girl, without anyone in her chair, seethed and mumbled under her breath (I went to K-Mart instead of waiting in the shop and having to be in the line of fire between the personnel) . Sorry, unless I see you in action before-- doing a similar cut as mine--I am not going to let you treat my hair like your clipper internship.
I was in a situation a couple of years ago at Holiday where I had to stop the girl cutting my hair mid-cut and insist that she lay down her weapons and let someone else take over. Geez, if I showed up at the high school where I work with a cut looking like where she was taking it, it would take 4 years to get it out of the system of the kids' mockery. Don't wanna look like Shemp from the Three Stooges.
Another factor is that Holiday Hair for women employees and Jiffy Lube for men employees have about the fastest employee turnover of any businesses I have ever seen. I'm serious, I walk into my Holiday or my Jiffy Lube, and I might recognize two workers. What happened? Did they violate parole? (more for the guys...some of those dudes look like they learned to change oil in the big house). Just when I develop three Holiday girls I can trust (I watch their work), they leave me.
So, I have started to go to a local barber down the road. No cat fights, no wait. He is a one man shop. He used to be a bridge-builder and then he couldn't do it anymore body-wise, so he switched careers and became a barber (a lifelong goal). I appreciate the fact that he knows how to wield the clippers gracefully and that he only charges $ 11. Without the franchise and managment layers taking their cut as it is at Holiday, the cut is cheaper and better. The cut at Holiday, if I remember correctly, is $ 18. Now that my wife runs her hand through my hair for free, the female touch means less to me now than it did when I was single.
The barber does seems to take a special relish in trimming eyebrow hair. He seems to be one of these men who likes to set things straight...be it eyebrow hair, a child, or otherwise. Plus, I think he had some pent-up frustration because he told me of another customer who has these super-brows, and who will not the barber trim them. I think some of this pent-up frustration came out yesterday when I went in for my haircut.
He leaned in hard into my eyebrows and gave me the equivalent of a scalping. When I saw how much of my brows he had in his comb ready to be mowed down, I winced. Now, my eyebrows are only slightly hairier than my Asian-ancestried wife. And that ain't much. She is going to have to add some darkness to mine, as she does to her eyebrows, if we go out in public.
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